i'm not exactly sure which would rank as THE most embarrassing. . . and now as I look back they're kind of funny. But not at the time of occurrence. Ironically, they both happened while I was in the army.
Embarrassing moment . . . the first. . .
I was stationed in the battalion headquarters. On the wall as you entered the building was an array of photos of the "higher ups" on the chain of command. On this particular day, there was a group of us eyeballing it. . . not for any particular reason.
One of those pictures was a captain. . . one of the more amiable officers in the battalion. Well. . . although not especially old, he had a naturally wrinkled face.
I turned and looked at the others and nonchalantly said. . . 'If he had horns, he'd look like the devil."
As fate would have it, he was standing right behind me and heard every word I said. I felt lower than a snake in the core of the earth. Fortunately, he just smiled. And I'll never know what he thought.
Embarrassing moment the first. . . part two.
Oddly enough, this was military related also.
Before i left for basic, my old friend who had already served gave me some advice. Which later on came to bite me.
He showed me a diagram how my trunk was to be laid out. . . everything neatly folded along with
other odds and ends. . . including a shaving brush. . . and I say that for a reason. What he didn't tell me was that the regs called for everything in the trunk to be of some use. Nothing extraneous allowed.
Remember that.
Well, it was my first inspection. And I was as nervous as a virgin at a prison rodeo. Our CO .looked in my trunk. . .and then gave a perplexed look. He picked up the shaving brush and put it up to my nose. Then asked. . .
"Do you use this private?"
I said. . . "Yes sir."
He then proceeded to run his finger across the top of the soft bristles. And dust flew everywhere.
He said. . "I don't think so." . .. . and pitched it over his shoulder. I was later informed of the number of shades of red I turned. My first demerit.
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Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/23/2019 05:33PM by RAMbeau.
