My best similar experience was also in DFW..

Just back from two week sin Mexico.. Had 4 bottles of home made tequila in unmarked bottles in my checked bag.. the limit is two bottles..

but that crap was SO good I was gonna AT LEAST try to get it in the country..

it was somewhat late at night so customs apparently didn't wanna get too involved.. I pushed the cart with our 3 checked bags and 2 carry ons up to the guy and he looks me square in the eye and asks, "Got any food items in your luggage?"

..and I look him square in the eye and reply, "No sir.. No foods"..

..and he says, " Welcome back to America"

Hey, I didn't lie.. I didn't have any "food items" in my bag... lol

Another trip we also brought back 4 bottles but my wife thought she'd get sneaky and put the tequila in a hair conditioning bottle.. So, we go to a party with friends a few nights later.. everybody there had had that tequila before and LOVED it.. It tasted more like amaretto or some kind of liqueur.. Actually tasted VERY good, but had the knockout punch of Mike Tyson..

So I pour everyone a shot and we toast and go to down it and everybody there spit out the tequila at the same time.. My wife had not adequately rinsed the conditioner bottle before putting the tequila in it.. what a waste..

---

Friendship is like peeing your pants.. Everybody can see it, but only you can feel the warmth..