Re: It was a dark stormy night

Quote
Atlantic Ram
I was flying across the Atlantic on a bet that my 1936 Fiat CR.42 biplane couldn't make it to my friend's landing strip in Orta San Giulio in Italy from my ranch outside of Ocean City, Maryland.

When I took the bet, I rigged the aircraft with an extra fuel tank. But I was too lazy to go to Pep Boys to get a proper diameter fuel line and used two half diameter to make up the difference.

So I am a couple hundred miles out and I of course smell the fuel. I always did a little. But this was stronger than normal and the engine was struggling a bit. Being only a few hundred miles out I decided to turn around and give the biplane a good once over when I got back. I knew I had plenty of fuel even if all of the fuel in the extra tank drained out. And more than enough to get back to my ranch.

I was checking the Rams board on my phone on the way back to see if the new server was up and running and I could either use my old name (Ram'opoly) or go with something new. So I signed up as Atlantic Ram and was trying to post something about Steven Jackson not being an elite back when I started to get nauseous. I hit "post message" and nearly blacked out.

Usually I have a "co-pilot" (my buddy Dan who is mechanically inclined to fix stuff when things break, come loose... whatever) but I couldn't take the risk on this particular flight. Anyway, Elon Musk (Tesla) and I used to wing walk together. He saved my butt more than I care to tell and he was a particularly good wing walker. Dude is multi-talented. I should add here that I am wearing my wing suit just in case of something just like this. And I had contact with several controllers so I wasn't lost or anything. So I am in no real danger at any point in my trip. I really just needed to clear my head.

So I used my belt to secure the yoke (control wheel) to keep the plane sort of level for a few minutes while I got out of the cockpit and up to the top wing of the biplane. I wanted to text my wife quickly that I loved her just in case the worst should happen but noticed that ZN had replied to my post. Being curious, mostly because we had gotten into a bit of a debate a few weeks earlier, I had to see what his response was. Unfortunately I lost my grip on the phone because the iphones were so much smaller then. I could hear it bounce a few times on the sheet metal before it was lost to the fishes... or so I thought.

As I cleared my head I looked over the wing at the engine and could see fuel being flung off... like throwing water onto a box fan. It struck me that using two smaller fuel lines was creating some kind of vacuum that was basically pouring gas onto the engine. I hadn't cleared the lines first so the fuel bladder was getting rid of the fuel to try to balance the pressure. I had to fix it. If I clamped one of the fuel lines it would ease the pressure in the tank and then I could release the clamp and it should be fine.

I stood up and almost immediately the wind got under the webbing of the wing suit and lifted me off the wing. I was able to grab one of the wooden braces. And as I am holding on I see my iphone lodged in the corner of one of the cross braces right in front of me. I could read ZN's reply about how I had taken SJ's stats out of context. Seriously? I had to reply to his response but my wife was calling. I had her on speaker and asked her to give me a moment to finish my post but again I lost my grip on the phone and in my attempt to grab it I knocked it into the air. I listened to her asking "hello?" repeatedly before the phone at last found its way off the plane and to the sea. I had tugged so hard on the brace trying to catch the phone that one end of the brace popped off from the wing... and then the other... and just like that, I was in a free fall. I was completely out of control for what seemed like minutes but soon enough got my wits about me and straightened myself up. Wing suits are awesome!

Anyway to make a long story short. I was able to glide nearly a quarter of a mile and ended up in the water just a few miles from shore. I swam the rest of the way, got to Atlantic Avenue and got a taxi for the 30 minute trip home. The plane of course crashed into the ocean and we found the debris spread out for miles the next day.

And that is how I came up with the name. Either that or I thought the name sounded simple and I live in a beach town on the Atlantic Ocean...