Catheter removal is kind of like an Anti Bucket List..

item for me.. I can picture a nurse with both hands on it and her foot planted against the bed, yanking with everything she's got trying to get that thing to move and it just ain't budging....

They inject WD40, by the gallon, and the only difference it makes is that my room now smells like a mechanic's bordello..

Someone suggests heating it up in hopes that heat will shrink the catheter, for easy removal.. So, they go to the kitchen restaurant and borrow a Crème brûlée torch.. I'm like, NO WAY and go hide under the bed.. Unfortunately they have a line that takes them right to me and even gives them a line to yank me out with..

These are the things that float through my transom when I hafa do something I don't wanna do.. If I hafta get my kidney tumor removed, the surgeon told me I'll hafta get a catheter..

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Friendship is like peeing your pants.. Everybody can see it, but only you can feel the warmth..